Build your inner coach

February 20, 2022by Editorial Team
Critic or coach?

Situations around us tend to make us doubt our abilities and weaken our confidence. Perhaps most of us are wired this way. But how do tackle this? How do we train our minds to overcome this and turn stronger? The answer too lies within us, as long as we do not lie to ourselves.

Who is a leader?

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”– John Quincy Adams.

Generally, when we hear the word leader, we generally think of a politician running a country or an activist heading a social movement. We seldom think of ourselves having an active role in it. However, we can ourselves be leaders as well. This is not as mammoth as it sounds, though. We just have to be willing enough to find what gives us that little push so that we can work towards it. As Greta Thunberg, a 15-year-old Swedish activist had once said, “You are never too small to make a difference”

Understanding ourselves as leaders

We are actually a manifestation of what we think, of our attitude towards life and its challenges. Our inner critic starts highlighting the mistakes we make and starts breaking us down, instead of building us up. We have to try to turn our inner critic into our inner coach. We can start by trying to understand and accept our inner critic, protecting us from getting adversely affected. Being self-critical makes us more empathetic with ourselves.

When our inner critic is being strongly vocal, it may be a sign of our increased vulnerability. We need to acknowledge and accept and experience it. We should thus subsequently allow our inner critic to give way to develop into our inner coach. Our inner coach is like our own personal cheerleader. It supports and motivates us when things are tough, helps us develop our character, and can even offer the secret recipe for our success.

Our inner voice

Each of us has her own private voice. Whenever we find ourselves stuck, our private voice first tends to think of the worst possible outcome. Here it is human nature that makes us so hard on ourselves and very self-critical at the same time. This accounts for our private voice to turn into our strongest inner critic.

Our inner voice gives us strong messages. However we can also control this inner voice to a great extent. Strong positive messages from our private voice can help us lead a happier and more fulfilling life.

The full circle: decoded

The biggest challenge for any teenager is to coach oneself to believe- ‘I can’. This is the strong self doubt that lurks in one’s mind every time she thinks of taking an initiative of doing something new or different. The answer that keeps one going is – Let us give it a try! Even if one does not succeed in the final mission, it will help one learn something more, add up to one’s memories, and provide the opportunity to experience something new. The inner voice focuses less on the result, more on the process. Every new experience that one has, builds up one’s character. Strength of character builds positivity, and in turn, self confidence, thereby rotating the cycle of coaching. One of those qualities that fuels this movement is perseverance. This is the sheer grit to fight back after a failure or two.

Negative people never inspire others. Negative thoughts cannot make you a better person. So, we should coach ourselves to be positive thinkers so that our private voice gives us strong positive messages and we focus on building a more positive character.


About the authors

This article has been contributed by the following students from Our Lady Queen of the Missions School, Park Circus, Kolkata- Sriadita Chowdhury and Tanisha Mitra.

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